February Mediation
Try to at least twice between rituals to practice this meditation, especially when you are doing the energy work exercises listed below.
I have found that the lovingkindness meditation feeds the soul and it breaks down some of the unspoken barriers between the seen and the unseen.
“We’re all a little weird. And life is weird. And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall into mutually satisfying weirdness—and call it love—true love.
Dr. Seuss
Now that we have a better grasp of who we are, we are moving into why we are.
This month’s exercises are very much about how did love change your story? How do you love? Why is love important?
Spirits of Place Exercise
There is something you love within reach. Is it a cat? Dog? Fish? Snake? Stuffty? Plant? Piece of Art? Tree in the Park? Anything embued with inherent worth and dignity?
Choose one creature and over the next month and bond with it
I’m going to use cats for an example, because they are what I use.
Touching the cat, I send my attention to her fur, the softness of it, the slight electricity on a dry winter night, the delicate joints and muscles, the viscera, the bones. The more completely I can visualize it, the easier it is to feel like I am building a connection to my creature. Use that awareness to detect when she is overstimulated or in pain or cold or tired. Use that awareness to interpret her curious mix of body and vocalizations that sound like she’s been smoking behind the bleachers.
The key is to connect your awareness to a larger world of awareness
Ancestors Exercise
Whoever they are and whether they were blood relatives or not, we all have ancestors we love. Who is your favorite ancestor? Mom or Dad? Granma or Granpa? Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru?
Choose one ancestor’s story and try to understand why it speaks to you
What virtues and values did you learn from this story?
What cautions did you learn from this story?
What dysfunctions did you learn from this story?
The key is to connect your story to a larger family of stories
Deity Exercise
While we live in a culturally Christian country, we have studied the mythologies of other cultures, whether in high school World History class or in college or in libraries and on computers.
When you look at your story and the story of your ancestors, what values have come down to your from their faiths?
Choose one worldview/pantheon/philosopher and try to understand why you love
Study the mythology, compare it to your personal mythology and how that intersects with American mythology and Calvinist mythology.
What do you love about the worldview? What stories in those mythologies do you love? Are there particular deities you are drawn to? Why?
Is this a European worldview? Why did you choose it?
Love changes us, but we change how we love too.
Holly Black
What’s Your Metaphor?
In writing about love, many have turned to metaphors to tell the tale. The list is long: Love is an ocean, a pearl, a burning flame, a battlefield, a beggar, a disease, a rose, a fine wine, a slippery slope, an archer, an outlaw, a fever, a jewel, even an exploding cigar!
There’s something important in this effort. Love, as we know, is elusive. Every version of it has a complexity that can’t be captured with precise and concrete language. We turn to metaphors because, just like love, they aren’t
easily pinned down. They tell a story more than offer a definition. They evoke a feeling rather than attempt to satisfy our logical mind. And so, in that elusiveness and expansiveness, they actually get closer to the truth. Our truth actually.
So, here’s your assignment: spend the month finding your favorite metaphor for love!
Don’t rush it. Noodle on it a number of times before settling on the one. You, of course, need to start by figuring out what “favorite” means to you. And, from there, how it might capture your unique experience with love.
A Love Letter to the Underappreciated
Cats, friends, lovers, books, movies. They get our love all the time. We go on and on about our affection for them in a whole host of ways. But what about the underappreciated loves? Those favorite things in our lives
that we fail to mention as often because love for them is less widely shared. This month write a love letter to one of those!
Here are some suggestions: Your favorite… letter of the alphabet, article of clothing, comfort food, time of day, season, or even your favorite condiment! Or what about your first car, first baseball glove, or first guitar?
Here’s our suggestions about what to include in the letter: All the ways you love them, your memory of how they first came into your life, how your life would be without them in it, how they changed you for the better,
what they taught you. And it’s not just about how you loved/ love them; it’s also about naming and acknowledging how they loved/love you back.
Ask Them About Love
One of the best ways to explore our monthly themes is to bring them into the conversations you have with those closest to you. It’s a powerful way to deepen our conversations and our relationships.
Below is a list of “love questions” to help you on your way.
Keep a lookout for how your inner voice is trying to send you a word of comfort or challenge through these conversions with others.
Love Questions:
1. What did love mean to you as a child?
2. How have you changed your mind about love?
3. How has love changed as you’ve gotten older? Is it softer? Quieter? Larger? Tougher? Smaller?
Sneakier? More central?
4. Whose love has been with you the longest?
5. When did love scare you the most?
6. When did love invite you to play?
7. What most helped put you back together after love broke you to bits?
8. What is society’s biggest misunderstanding about love?
9. It’s been argued that “If we really want to love we must learn how to forgive.” Does that ring true for you?
10. What promise might love be wanting you to make?
11. What do you know of “a love that will not let us go”?
12. What has been your greatest act of love?